Unmet Expectations

  

I wrote this blog about expectations while sitting in the woods of a beautiful state park in Ohio. The yellow background of this blog is a photo I took of a tree with its fall foliage. Then I placed a turquoise painting on the photo and included a mandala I sketched freehanded and also painted. The beautiful fall leaves this time of year inspire me!

Life Lessons

Proverbs 14:26 He who fears the LORD has a secure fortress, and for his children it will be a refuge.

My parents were missionaries in Europe and they took me to church every Sunday, Wednesday night plus any other nights of the week for music practice, studies, events, etc. My Aunt Betty and Uncle Darrell also raised their own children in church and since I was at their home so often I went along. My senior year of high school I trusted in Christ as my personal Savior. I knew all about God in my head from growing up in church but I didn't have a personal relationship with Him in my heart until January 28, 1976.

God called me to ministry at 21 years of age and I also took my own children to church every time the door was open. I never let any other school or sport event interfere with church because I felt it was a priority. We have some amazing memories of our time together as a family and growing up in church.

Church is a place for children to learn how to do LIFE! There isn't any other institution here on this earth that teaches exactly what our children need in order to handle every situation for their future. There are still no guarantees that your children will turn out right but it gives them every opportunity to know the way....

This is a picture I took of my husband playing the drums with our daughter

 and her husband in 2012. They have all been involved with the Worship Team

 for many years. It is a joy to watch them all as they share in ministry 

and I am able to enjoy the music while holding my little grandchild. 

My Future Is In His Hands

It's been a while since I've written my thoughts down. For the last month or so, I've been lost. I don't know what to write, what to pray for or some days how to function.

It's been said that if you're still alive then God has a plan to use you. I'm alive but I don't know what he could possibly use me for? There are so many areas in my life that I need to work on, to give over to him to change me. The last month, I've been ashamed of who I've become. I so desperately want to change but I'm so scared of how to begin or more scared of....will the change last?

I finally realized that I sabotage relationships, good relationships. I push them away. I thought I was over my abandonment issues but I think there is something deeper that I'm not seeing. God, I need you to reveal my heart, my issues or what is the cause of my issues.

My Heavenly Father - I need you to pour down your Holy Spirit over me. I am lost, and I don't know how to overcome it. Only you can pull me up out of this pit and renew my spirit, my heart, my love for you. I pray that you will make all things new.  In your precious son's name - AMEN!!!

written by Tracey Graham